I have adjusted back into HEB, the internet and being with my family again. I have yet to stay in one place for very long but will soon not be living out of my suitcase finally. I think haha.
I am thankful for how the Lord has allowed my time to be filled, it has helped the transition of being back-and with the initial sour taste about being home. I knew that a lot of unknowns were waiting and that I was exactly where God had said to be in Brazil- why would I leave that?! Because that is what He planned and I have to choose thankfulness.
A fear I have had as time has gone by is forgetting what the Lord spoke and allowed me to witness in Brazil. I am so thankful for the moments of conversation that I have had so far to share about Brazil and remember all that He did.
The Lord spoke to my heart clearly as we were in Brazil last year in a different area, yet among His creation and his people. I wanted to be back and knew he would make the way in confidence that I knew he had spoken.
There are ways that he created me that I do not understand and have never known that they could be used as ministry or useful for the Kingdom work, He made that clear while in Brazil. I was homeschooling yet that in it of itself was about 20% of what I spent my time doing. Our church body at Living Hope has prepared us well (when we are willing) to be a help. For us to go out and have no expectations other than loving God and loving others. The Lord takes that so creatively and grows something amazing. From teaching, to babysitting, to baking, crafts, flexibility and other crazy things- He used IT ALL. The needs that the family had, the work that God has blooming in Brazil, and my gifts and hobbies had a perfect connection and intertwined in such an affirmative way of his plan and goodness.
I was able to deeply walk along side two amazing and very different families and they willingly walked along side me as I was there. I witnessed families grow (literally) and marriages strengthened through challenges and the daily life of the jungle. A/C was a treat, water was a miracle on some days and keeping the ants from the food was a victory. I watched the kids' imagination explode during homeschool, with their dolls and legos and outside when it wasn't pouring down rain. Cooking takes hours and the basic of the basics have to be made from scratch. I learned that the specific and constant power of prayer was the only way to survive. Do we ask our missionaries about the hard little parts of their days? PS not all of them can run to a closet, a coffee shop or their rooms to splurge on a Coke, Netflix and chocolate like we can :) Relying on the Lord for strength, energy and passion were ever on my mind as I watched these sweet families live life.
The kids are amazing, and understand the roles their parents play. One day when we were talking about Missionary kids, I asked the boys some questions. I asked what was something they don't like about being a MK and what is something they like? The middle answered, "I don't like that we have to move and leave our friends, but I like that mom and dad are here to share the good news of Jesus as missionaries." He get's it, and it was a beautiful thing to watch this one grow and commit his life to Jesus during my time there. The sacrifice is huge at times, they leave family, sweet grandparents, comforts of the States BUT they know why and they are so taken care of by the Lord.
There was a time when we were preparing to go to Malawi a few years ago and we were wrestling with the idea that ministry and being in God's will meant that you were always in hard situations and that what we want couldn't possibly be what God wants. In true Mark Henry fashion he set us straight so gently and clearly. There are times where (PRAISE THE LORD) our desires and God's will ARE THE SAME! We should rejoice, not doubt and reject his blessing. I am forever grateful for that moment and have to remind myself daily of that. We pray for our desires and the Lord's will to be the same, let us rejoice when they are!
I had the amazing joy to be exactly where the Lord wanted me, and I could not have asked for a better 4 months, yes being away from home had it's communication and relational issues but the Lord is faithful. We either believe he has a plan and a purpose or we don't. He provided for every need, and even the very real ones I didn't know I had. Isn't he wonderful? He makes a way so specifically for us in his will, that brings glory to him and guides each step.
In this next leg of the journey there are more questions than answers and more unknowns than I can handle alone. This is the great time of asking for prayer as I seek direction from the Lord and trust the Spirit that dwells within me. He brings great comfort in his faithfulness that I often look back on and cannot wait to rejoice in what he has next.
Thank you for coming along side me, I pray that the Lord has used this time for you and your growth in him as well. He is a good good Father
